Redneck Christmas

FH and I had this great idea.
I wasn't going to blog about it because my kids have been known to read my blog. True story.
If you are reading now K&A, STOP! Or you will get a spanking asap. :)
I decided I would go ahead and blog about it and if they read it then I will just do what most guilty people do.

 Deny. Deny. Deny.

I wrapped a few Christmas presents while the girls were at their Dad's house this weekend. I knew they would freak if they got home and there were presents under the tree but none for them. So we looked through the stuff we had already bought and found something to wrap.
We were so excited about what we were wrapping because we just knew that the girls would NEVER be able to guess what the presents were.
They had NEVER mentioned that they wanted these gifts.
They had NEVER even talked about getting them before.
We just thought that the gifts would be something cool for FH to do with them and that they would really enjoy it.

Side note:
Kate told me all she wanted for her birthday (which is in March, I should add. they plan ahead) was to go hunting.
My husband isn't a hunter.
Neither is their dad.
Good luck on getting that birthday present, Mom.
I have a few hunters lined up so I'm hoping one of them follows through for us. If not, looks like I'll be hunting somehow. And by hunting, I mean we might find a treehouse to sit in, dress in camo, and freeze. Of course I'll make sure to wait until it's about 2 degrees outside, and I will wake them up at 4AM, and warn them that when you hunt, you can't talk at all.
That should be the last time that they want to go.

Back to the presents.
So, they were all wrapped up and under the tree when K&A got home Sunday night.

And in walks Kate.
Right up to the Christmas tree.
She doesn't even take a second to think, she just looks over at us and says "Oh cool, we got guns!" and then picks up the smaller present, shakes it and says "and bullets!"
{my mouth drops to the floor}

Then in walks Alex.
She was outside so she DIDN'T hear her sister talking.
Immediately looks at tree and says "Oh cool! I know what those are!"
and then all together now "we got guns!" {Man, wouldn't it be cool to have a twin so you could say the same thing at the exact same time?}
{my mouth drops even farther}

Fail.

Me: Why would we buy y'all guns?
Michael: We don't have any little boys in this house. Why would guns be under the tree?
{mouth still dropped}

Kate shakes bullets small present and says "See, it sounds like BBs."
Me: How do you even know what BBs sound like? That could be a big present of Nerds. We do all like candy.

Fail.

The moral of the story is, you may think you are smarter than your kids. But you probably aren't.

Please note, I am neither confirming nor denying that those presents are actually guns and BBs. Or that I was beyond excited because I found the sold out last one available pink BB gun. #redneckChristmas

While putting up the Christmas tree, I noticed two things.

My favorite ornament.
I won't tell you how long FH and I had been dating when I bought this ornament...I'll just tell you that I knew we would be a family of 4 (hopefully eventually 5) really really REALLY soon after we started dating.

And I may or may not still look at FH this same way. See those googly eyes that girl reindeer is making at her hot husband? That's totally me.
That is not, however, real life with K&A hugging.

And my other favorite ornament.
I forgot about this ornament and died laughing when I saw it this year.
I blogged about this last year but I only had like 2 followers.
I'll have to see if I can find that blog.
Last year, when asked what she wanted for Christmas, Kate said all she wanted was hot wings.
No, that's not code for anything, she straight up wanted hot wings.
I swear I really do feed my kids.
#Ivegotafatmomproblems
So of course, homegirl got some hot wings.
And of course, I took a picture.
And now, we will forever remember the Christmas that brought us hot wings.

And next year, we will remember the Christmas that they got guns the girls tried to guess their presents. :)

And since this is my random Wednesday post, I have one random question for you. How long did it take you to get a bun in your oven once you started trying? {I told you it was random}
Yesterday, my friends and I all freaked out after reading this post.
Needless to say, it's quite scary for a girl who is, ahem, aging.

And after you answer my random question, please go here to visit some other random posts! And don't forget to come back tomorrow for my recipe linkup!

Happy Wednesday Wacky People!
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