Just a Tiny Touch

We all take things for granted.
As humans, as parents, even as children.
We know we can count on the sun to shine, the leaves to change, the weather to be unpredictable.
My kids have a roof over their head and our fridge has plenty of food in it. (Or at least it normally does anyways.....)
There are also plenty of things that we don't miss until they are not there.
A baby crying in the middle of the night.
Most new moms cringe when they hear their baby cry because it means they have to get up out of bed and miss more sleep.
I would LOVE for my baby to be at home crying in the middle of the night. It would be better to wake up every 4 hours to a baby instead of waking up to rock my breast pump.
Seeing a baby.
I know several adoptive Moms that would kill to see their baby just one time on their wait.
They cling to updated pictures as their only lifeline to a child that is living halfway around the world.
This makes me grateful that I can just go sit and stare at Baby Harper.
I guess we all have our challenges in motherhood.
One thing that I can say for sure about giving birth is that it's just like Big Brother, "expect the unexpected"
I'll get back to telling the birth story soon, promise.
I didn't get to see Baby Harper for 24 hours after he was born because I had to stay in bed with my IV. It was frustrating having everyone come tell me all about him. A child that I brought into this world but hadn't so much as laid my eyes on yet.
But when I finally got to see him, the anticipation was totally worth it.
My son was so handsome. Tiny but handsome. Little but fierce. Small but feisty.
We are so lucky to have tons of family and friends that wanted to love on the baby immediately.
But FH and I made one rule: no touching!
His skin is very sensitive so we didn't want a lot of people touching him.
Not to mention, we had to share a lot of firsts with other people so Mom and Dad needed something that they didn't have to share.
The nurses changed his first diaper, they'll get to feed him and it will still be awhile before we can rock him and love on him.
But yesterday, around 130 hours after he entered this world (there's an app for that....), his Dad and I got to touch him.
His hands are too tiny to hold.
And we can't pick him up and hug him.
But just putting my finger in his hand and then placing two fingers on his head was the most amazing feeling.
I touched my son.
And cried like a little baby.
There will be many more times when I hold his hand, give him a high five after a ballgame, or spank his little booty for talking back....but there will never, EVER be a moment as precious as that.
One touch made me weak in the knees. And so, SO grateful to be called his Mom.






















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