Living in the Country is Dangerous to my Health

I have a feeling I'm going to go into early labor.
And I blame it all on living in the country.
And vampires.
And swimsuits.

Let's talk about why.

First off, I was laying out the other day.
And I saw a mouse. Outside my house.
And almost had a heart attack/ went into labor.
Which would be no good since the baby is like 3 ounces big right now.
I called FH on the phone.
No lie, called him from outside when he was in the living room.
Turns out the mouse was a mole.
Who knew those things were so tiny?
Either way, it's my worst fear's closest cousin, so I freaked.
And FH, my knight in shining armour, killed the thing.
Don't ask how, but he basically saved my life.
I mean, I didn't even have shoes on so it was dangerous.

Next, we went to see World War Z.
Now I'll go ahead and tell you that this was my idea.
I thought it would be like 2012, end of the world stuff.
And that sounded better to me than the Superman movie.
But I had no clue there were zombies.
Please note, I am OBSESSED with the show The Walking Dead.
And it is full of zombies.
But I have to mentally prepare myself for that show.
And I still watch half of the show through my fingers which are covering most of my eyes. Sometimes I even cover my ears.
I stay on the edge of my seat, literally stressed out for the poor people.
So that's how I was the ENTIRE movie.
Stressed.
FH says that by the time The Walking Dead's new season starts, I'm gonna have to not watch it since I'll be so pregnant.

Third, the other day when I got out of my car, I thought I saw a mouse in the garage. And I about had a heart attack/ went into labor.
Turns out it was just a leaf moving under my feet.
But the point is that it COULD have been a mouse.
And I haven't jumped that high in months.

In case you haven't noticed, I am deathly afraid of mice.

Fourth, there I was on Saturday, minding my own business.
Sitting in a chair in the driveway reading a magazine like a fat lazy whale while FH was mowing the yard.
Please note, while he cuts the grass, my main job is to "keep him company" by being outside.
Sometimes I fail at this and go inside and nap instead.
So there I was, and a freaking lizard decides to run, slither, whatever it is that lizards do, right into the garage.
Are you freaking kidding me?
I'm not scared of lizards, but I honestly don't like any kind of animal that I can't keep my eyes on.
And almost a week later, I still step out of my car running to get into the house as quickly as possible. Because you never know, that lizard just might have an entire family living all up in our garage.

Fifth, it was raining cats and dogs last week one morning.
But I needed a Burger King sausage biscuit.
It's not my fault, I really needed it.
So I went a different way to work.
And a freaking tree had fallen in the middle of the road.
And it almost killed me.
Heart attack.
Luckily I was driving extremely careful and was able to dodge.
But it wasn't pretty.
And I never got my biscuit, which was a tragedy in itself.

Sixth, FH and I took the girls swimsuit shopping.
Holy mess.
Let's just say, I think I had hot flashes.
And nearly lost my patience.
I'm lying, I totally lost my patience.
Thank goodness stepdad of the year was there.
He didn't complain once even though I complained enough for us both.
We, no lie, went to the dressing room 3 times with each girl.
It was a horrible experience but thanks to his patience and his "calm down baby" comments that he said to me 472 times, we survived.
And the girls now have cute swimsuits.

And last but not least, this morning, on my drive to work, a rabbit decided to run out in the middle of the road and just stare at me.
It didn't help that I was going about 15 over the speed limit.
Don't worry, I didn't kill it.
Or go into early labor.
But it was freaking close.

The good news is that today I get to leave work one hour early, FH is off work all week so he'll be in my bed at night, my boss brought cookies, I'm off work tomorrow, my party is this weekend, and my birthday is on Monday. So yeah, I may be a little jumpy lately and have no patience, but life is good. :)

Happy almost Fourth of July y'all!!
And Happy almost my Birthday!
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