Just a Quick Update

I think that's all I blog lately, quick updates.
But currently, I have about one million things going on so blogging is taking a back seat.
I'm still trying to update often to keep up with BH's status though.
It seems right now as if I will never, EVER forget a single detail.
But I know the reality of it is that all of this will be just a memory eventually.

Still in the hospital.
112 long days, 16 weeks....almost to his 4 month birthday.
And we are still here.

Oddly enough, I'm okay with it though.

I was devastated when I found out we would have to stay 4 or 5 more weeks.
But I'm a FIRM believer that everything happens for a reason.

Had we gone home last week when expected, if our doctor would have just
let us go home on the oxygen, we would already be back at the hospital.
Which is my biggest fear.
When we leave, I want to be gone. Home for good.

So, at first, our doctor wanted us to stay longer to try to wean off oxygen, so we
didn't have to fool with it at home at all.
Then, we started to realize that he breathes faster than normal, which makes him really tired.
So they moved him to higher liters, and that broke my heart.

This entire time I have tried my best not to think about when we will go home.
And I've done well with that.
I focused more on getting him well, and letting him go home on his own time.
This helped because I had no expectations.
Sure, I wanted to be home immediately.
But I also knew I didn't want to take a baby home and risk some kind of accident at home because he wasn't ready. I mean, we are talking about a baby who holds his breathe sometimes, who coughs and turns purple during his bottle occassionaly. No matter how badly you want your baby home, you want him safe more. And at the hospital is where he is safest as long as there are still problems.

So, now we think that Harper is aspirating (the milk going into his lungs) while eating.
This is not cool because his lungs are still not completely developed and have problems of their own.
We are hoping to have a swallow study done this week, which will tell us if he will benefit from having his milk thickened...apparently if it is thicker, it will trigger his brain to swallow it correctly.

I've been told by nurses that whenever a baby needs this, as soon as their milk is thickened, they immediatly show improvement. That it makes a world of difference...so I'm praying that will be the case for us.

I no longer think about when he will be home.
After an infection scare last week, I'm just grateful to have a healthy baby.
I realized that this situation is not ideal, but he is not in a life-threatening situation, so we can handle it. And so many 26 weekers have faced many more challenges than him, so we have lots to be grateful for!

So, today begins a new week.
Hopefully with some answers. And another week of him growing.
We know that a lot of what he needs is just more time to grow.
I will sit back and let God handle this for us, knowing that he will come home when he is ready.

Happy Monday everybody! :) Pin It Now!